we cannot change the cards we are dealt,
just how we play the hand.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
2:42 AM
Canned
so. darn. incredibly. sexy.
the voices in my head-
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
10:07 PM
Parameters
governed by fences, that is how cattle graze. much in likeness, our actions are steered by certain boundaries. societal stimuli would impose laws. environmental stimuli would have us succumb to conformity. relation stimuli would be founded on a basis of trust and love.
they say one tends to stray on exchange. a peck on the cheek, a peek at the chick, an excuse well founded on culture and custom. understandably, i get a snort of disbelief when i say in full blown honesty that i have yet crossed the line. but perhaps, one of the stimuli had held the reins on my head(s) in domination.
and i wondered. what then, would i look to in junctures of cardinal decisions ungoverned by relationships. put simply, what would i do if i had a chance to beat a system and make a million.
societal and environmental stimuli fail me. i abhor customariness, i loathe harmonizing accord for the sake of normality. laws and systems could not hold, because the basis of its implementation was the presumption that one were caught. fractured as fracture puts it, every egg has its hairline crack.
a danger upon myself, yet one might recollect the ways of randy pausch. could i chase my dreams and enable that of others? alas, steal a million and donate half to charity. or just ten thousand, and half of it to make a couple hundred vagrants in blitheness. it would still be a folly, a camaraderie of sorts behind bars.
i need a higher order. i seek a higher Being.
the voices in my head-
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
9:40 PM
New Yacht
as a child, i had always dreamt about going deep into the battlefield amidst a raging war. perhaps that is why i sought crazy rotations in my army days. a recruit to a corporal, a sergeant to an lieutenant.
and perhaps that is why i'm headed for New York over the week. amidst bankruptcies and bailouts, recessions and retrenchments.
the voices in my head-
Saturday, October 11, 2008
1:08 AM
Alignment
studying's a chore,
teachers suck to the core,
life's a bore,
when results crappily fall.
but God's always just,
some get brains,
others get busts.
some are handsome,
others wear masks,
some tall as me,
some short as grass.
so Hakuna Matata!
get yourself a prata,
smack your lips with a fanta,
and relacjac chill like santa!
a little something that had lived in me since secondary two. i remember dalglish insisting we should each create a blog for goodness-knows-his-reasons, and i added a self-composed poem in a statement of creativity and nonpareil.
interestingly, i had lived by it. a happy, defiant, carefree soul to speak. but today, i retire it from my template. there is more to happiness of my own, yet i shall continue to chase my dreams, but this time strive to enable that of others as well.
infancy in its imbuement, but yes sir. what deal would it be, if i were the lonesome star. perhaps that is why the catastrophe of snaps and cracks warranted tears, but merely for a minute, no more.
the voices in my head-
Friday, October 10, 2008
4:06 AM
You First
i have had a childhood fantasy.
no not the one involving batman and wolverine, but the one involving jenna jameson and porn stars.
and you know, i think i've outgrown it. perhaps outlived it. not out of a weary wait, but because i had found myself someone better.
the voices in my head-
Thursday, October 09, 2008
11:36 PM
Snap
one can't change the cards dealt, just how the hand is played. i had lived by my resolution for a week now.
tonight, its been put to the test. it was pain, more like the cruciatus curse than ava kedavra. ain't a bit like GNETS, where pain was temporary before the swirling blackness set in. and alas, what tore apart was more than meets the eye, for it shattered the spirit, keen on a recovery comeback.
and right before, i attempted a dunk. missed by less than an inch. two more weeks would have it nailed.
snap. i shivered. i cried.
the voices in my head-
Friday, October 03, 2008
2:18 AM
The Last Lecture
there are moments that change your life. and ten years later to know in retrospect about one of those moments, you're blessed. but to know it at that moment, with it staring through your soul, that's another thing.
in 23 years, i have had one moment like that. and yesterday, i had another.
strived for excellence, perhaps the education system had carved a bell-curve concept in me. excellence in a manner of exclusive excellence. there was somewhat an immanent need to stand out, to be unique.
i had to be special. and by definition, special meant extraordinary; exceptional; distinguished or different from what is ordinary or usual. i can't have everyone special, or i wouldn't be special anymore would it. have you had some curious emotion when your best friend outscored you in a test - and you congratulated him with a half-smile and a knuckle half-clenched, a resolution to beat him the next? this brought about an undying need to love myself more than anything and anyone else in the world.
and so it is. much like the queen licensed to be late, i took up a resolution. i prayed a 'lil prayer to give me the strength and spirit to sprinkle a new dimension to my life. i will continue to chase my dreams, but this time, i seek to enable the dreams of others as well.
the last lecture by randy pausch. i know now, there are greater things than greatness of thyself.
the voices in my head-
i love my girl. a love so beautiful, symmetrical, tangible
God loves me. a love so great, unconditional, real.
my life in a nutshell. working towards loves of sorts. beautiful, symmetrical, tangible, great, unconditional and real.
a page, deliberately left blank.
Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking.
It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails.
I Corinthians 13:4-8
Get awesome blog templates like this one from BlogSkins.com